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Man, if we're counting real people in here, my friends were in this AWFUL love triangle a few years back...

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I've been in one of these. It's just horrible. My ex started dating an (now ex-)friend of mine and now I don't talk to either of them. No one else does either.

Ross Gellar from Friends is quite unlucky...

Omfg, that was a bad one. Can see it working its way into a novel or sitcom or soap opera.

Mine's a bit more calm I suppose...

Hannah dumped me the day after I told her I was bisexual (although, she tried her hardest not to let on that that was the real reason) and things moved on. She seemed more upset than me by the break up, so I told people that she deserved the sympathy more than me because I'm such a fucking nice caring guy. Now I wish I hadn't.

A month-ish passed and we were still on talking terms of some sort. It was a bit forced, I'll admit. Then after a few evenings out, I commented to Ellie that she seemed a little flirty with Matt. Ellie agreed so we decided to keep an eye on it. It came to a head at Abby's birthday party. Hannah and Matt pulled and Matt's ex, the second Hannah in the group, nearly threw him down the stairs in a drunken rage because he'd apparently given her the come on too. And even asked her to strip for him! (You can see where this gets more confusing.)

I was told that Hannah and Matt had pulled because, even though I didn't really want her back if she couldn't accept me for who I was, I couldn't bear to see her with someone else. I don't think she knew I knew at this point. Later in summer, another party. Slightly tipsy, as I went to leave, Hannah asked me if I hated her and told me that she was sorry. The next morning I had a text message from her, explaining she had to say sorry while drunk or she wouldn't do it. Also, and this is the important bit, that she wouldn't get with him until I was going to be comfortable with it.

OK, so, then here we are at the last party of the summer holiday. Hawaiian theme. Bright shirts. Garlands. You know the drill. Anyway, I've told myself that I need to talk to Hannah. So I somehow get her alone and tell her that it upset me that they pulled in the first place, but I couldn't control them and if it was really what they wanted, they could get together. She told me that she didn't want to hurt me so, again, they would wait until I was comfortable with it. Apparently they had discussed it. I also revealed at that point that, to add to all the confusion, I had had a crush on Matt, but this had vanished the minute I found out he liked her.

So, a week back at school - the most painful week of my life. Now, if they are going to flirt or what-have-you, I'd rather they didn't do it in front of me. But no, they did. They knew I was watching them. I'd check who was going places and, if those two were, I would make sure I'd go, or employ someone to watch them if anything happened. I was so very stalker-ish around this point. Scared myself. That Friday, the fair was in town so we went to that. It ended, as we walked back to Harriet's, with Matt and Hannah holding hands and being all gross. I'd say that this is where I flipped but you ain't seen nothing yet.

My other friends were just as pissed off as me because they knew what she'd said to me and stuff, so they were less than pleased with it all too. But our group will not confront one another unless absolutely necessary, so nothing was said. I left Harriet's quite early with everyone telling me that it was me they loved and if they group had to split, they would be on my side. God, I love my friends. I say if the group had to split but at this point it seemed like the group was going to collapse because of the amount of drama going on in it.

So the weekend rolled over with me having various violent images of smashing their heads into brick walls and screaming at random intervals. Back to school Monday. Elaine and Alice were adamant that they were going to talk to them and ask why they were doing it. Monday and Tuesday were a nightmare. They were holding hands and all sorts of stuff ... I can't recall if they kissed. Anyway, Wednesday. This was the big one. Elaine and Alice were, indeed, having a go at Matt and Hannah but while I was sitting there. Getting very pissed off, I grabbed my bag and marched outside. Elaine and Alice had already gone out and as I stormed past them, I yelled at them. I forget what, but it was loud. They froze to the spot and I thundered down the school drive.

As I reached the car park, I heard someone shout my name from behind me. Expecting it to be Elaine, Alice or maybe Louise or someone else from the common room, I was shocked when I turned round and saw Hannah running at me. I carried on walking, despite her protests. She finally caught me and grabbed my bag. The shouting match occured something like as follows: (M = Me, H = Hannah)

H: Please stop! Let me talk to you.
M: Why do you think I want to talk to you?
H: Im so sorry! I really wanted to talk to you.
M: But why didnt you? Did you just think it would all go away if you ignored it?
H: No. I wanted to talk to you about it before. Its not the way I wanted you to find out. I should have done but I was scared about losing you. And now I have and I dont know what to do!
M: Why didnt you just do it? You left it too long.
H: I know, I know I should have talked to you about it. I was so worried about losing you though. I just wanted us to be friends but
M: Well, youve left that far too late, *start walking off*
H: Michael, wait, I know I shouldve spoken to you. *voice gone wobbly*
M: "I just dont get it! One minute youre holding hands and then youre not. Some people say youre not going out and others say you are. What the hell is going on? *beat*
H: "We've been going out since Friday."
M: "Well thanks for telling me!"
H: "Wait..."
M: "JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!" *runs off, straight past my psychology teacher who heard everything and has since given her view on things, feeling that Hannah was just trying to fob me off*

So I stormed off in a complete huff, recieved text messages from Hannah, Matt and Abby while down the park but ignored them all and then wandered around the estate until the end of break. Then I went back in went into the study area instead of the common room, purposely walking past the common room so they would see I was in. Louise and Lucy came into see me and said that Hannah had come back up crying and then gone to the toilet to clean up or something. They also said Matt wanted to talk to me and I told them not to encourage him and if he really wanted to, then he could of his own accord.

He did and I was very cold and harsh to him, telling him that he had betrayed me. It wasn't the fact that they were together that annoyed me the most. It was the fact that Hannah had said just ONE WEEK before they started going out that they wouldn't do anything. The next day Hannah wrote me a letter which I read in the school toilet and refused to let anyone else read. The day after that, I talked to Hannah in response (my general cowardice would not reduce me to writing a letter) and told her exactly how I feel. I made it quite clear that despite Hannah saying that one of the reasons we broke up was because of religious differences (she's Christian, I'm atheist), Matt is just as much of an atheist as I was. At the time of writing this now however, he seems well on the way to conversion. It is worth noting that Hannah actually invites Matt to their Christian meetings and things, yet the invitations were never extended to me when we were going out.

Now, the pair of them are left alone with few other friends. When they started dating, they were all over each other in school - PDAs abound - and it was unneccessary (I was never like that, I don't like PDAs). They still are.

Sooo, anyway, there we have it. Together, they are annoying and all over each other. Alone, Matt tries to intregate himself back into the group - with poor results. Alone, Hannah sits quietly and seems to understand that it is her own fault that we have gone off her. Occasionally I feel sorry for her, but she did it. I rarely talk to either of them and wish I could tell them that their PDAs are gross but I will just look like "the jealous ex" so it's impossible. I've made some snide comments about it, so they know how I feel.

Hopefully you understand the story now. I've left out some of the more confusing bits that don't fit quite exactly (e.g., Abby's feelings, Sam's feelings, the other Hannah's feelings and so on) but on the whole that's the complete thing.

Man, it's been so long since I've said about that!

My entire group is a mess. Abby is an alcoholic obese nymphomaniac with the lungs of a 49-year-old due to excessive smoking.

Claire is engaged to Alice's older brother ... it's all just one big nightmare.